Sudan Protests XI

Sitting behind a screen, all safe and well, has made me (and I guess many others out there) feel extremely powerless. I want to do so much. I want to be out there in the streets with all brave Sudanese, bake some cookies for them, make them happy and encourage them to continue their struggle. I want to tell everyone that they can do this; they can make Bashir leave and put him to justice as he should have been a loooong time ago. They can withstand the police and the NISS, all without violence. They can do it, simply based on their love for their country and for each other. They can do it with that wonderful humour and friendliness that is so characteristic for the Sudanese people.

I've felt powerless, but today I actually feel that I've done something. Me and my husband (who is Sudanese) was interviewed by Swedish Radio P3 News about Sudan, our experiences and thoughts about what's going on at this moment. And when I get back home, I see that #SudanRevolts has hit the frontpage of one of Sweden's biggest newspapers. Finally the Sudanese people gets some attention from this part of the world!

Here's the web-article from the radio interview.

I hope, with all my heart, that this will be the end of a horrible era filled with violence, war, genocide, torture, discriminations and corruption. And I hope it will be the beginning of a new one, based on democracy, human rights and freedom. I hope every Sudanese soon will feel safe in their own country and among each other. I hope I can go back with my family and show my son how awesome his second home country can be.

Update: It's only 8 PM here but I can hardly keep my eyes open. Been a long day and the little man has kept me busy with babbling, hand clapping and pooping. So, I'm going to leave the writing for today and do my best to disconnect my brain from revolutionary thinking. Some links to provide you with updated info about #SudanRevolts:

- Reuters, Police quell student protest in East Sudan: witnesses
- AhramOnline, Sudan activists call for Tahrir-style million-man protest
- Aljazeera, Sudan using protests "to silence dissenters"
- Alarabiya, U.S. condemns crackdown on Sudan anti-government protests
- SudanRevolts, A Statement from the Broad National Front to the Youth of Sudan
- Foreign Policy, The Sudanese Standup
- Sudanese Online, Statement on the latest developments of the protests in Sudan for public dessimenation
- Sudanese Online, Omer al-Bashir: Take a Look over Your Shoulder
- Sudanreeves, Sudan: Desperate for Regime Change Over Many Years

How Everything Changed

On November 27th, our beautiful son was born. It was without a doubt the biggest, life altering happening of my life. You can pretend and keep telling yourself that you're aware and prepared for what is to come, but it's not until the moment when you have that tiny, slimy person on your chest that you understand exactily how much everything has changed - just like that.

Gone are the days of worrying about yourself and gone are the nights of good sleep. All replaced by this enormous, undescribable joy and love for the fragile person that you helped give life to. Suddenly you're no longer just you, you're now a parent; completely and fully responsible for the safety and wellbeing of another person; a person that will (hopefully) love you unconditionally and put all his faith and trust in you. You're supposed to be that person that knows everything, can solve any problem and lead you in the right direction. It's not an easy task and certainly not something to take lightly.

The delivery was no an easy one and I wish I could say that it was the most wonderful experience in my life, like so many mothers seem to do. But (without revealing too scary details) after hours of excrutionating pain, the doctor finally decided to help out by using a vacuum extractor while 2-3 nurses were so kind and pressed my belly since the baby's heart started to slow down. A few minutes later a beautiful boy was born. I remember I had to ask "is that my son?" to understand that it was finally over.

Two months later I finally find the time and ability to focus enough to write this down. My son (I still find it strange and wierd to write/say "my son") is sleeping in my arms and my wonderful husband is cooking up some Sudanese fish dish in the kitchen. It's amazing to have your own family. Still hard to believe, but amazing.

My son. He is the love of my life and my greatest accomplishment. I'll give everything I have and more to make sure he always feels loved and safe.

Oslo Attacks

The destruction on Akersgate, Oslo

Late this afternoon, a bomb hit a government building in Akersgate in Oslo, Norway, killing at least seven people and another two are badly wounded. Later a man who was said to be dressed as a police officer started shooting at a Labour Party youth camp in Utøya outside of the capital, at least four people are said to have been killed and one person is reported to have been arrested. Eyewitnesses claim to have seen 20-25 dead bodies on the island. Noone has yet taken responsibility for the attacks but BBC's diplomatic correspondent says that "the fact a government building was targeted makes one think this could be connected with government decisions on Afghanistan or Libya."

The two attacks are believed to be connected, the Norwegian police says.

In Sweden, the police and security police (SÄPO) have sharpened their surveillance around important buildings in the capital Stockholm after the Oslo bombings. The grade of threat remains the same (which is hightened) as it's been since October last year but Sweden is following the development in its neighboring country closely.

What happened is horrible and deeply concerning, as with any attack against civilians. Akersgate is a busy street in central Oslo, especially on a Friday afternoon. The Labour Party camp is intended for youths and around 700 people were attending it, most teenagers. My heart and thoughts goes out to our friends in Norway and I pray that none of my own friends in Oslo are among the dead or injured.

• DN writes about the shooting in Utøya (in Swedish)
• SVD and DN has pictures from the bombing in Akersgate
• BBC News allows you to follow the events live
• Reuters has a list of likely suspected groups

Update 23:50: Deputy Oslo police chief Sveining Sponheim tells reporters the man under arrest is 32 and "ethnic Norwegian" and has never worked with the police. The Norwegian national under arrest is believed to be responsible for both attacks. The motive behind the attacks are still unclear.
 

Are you in Oslo? I would like to get in touch with you to ask some questions about personal experiences. Write me a comment or email me. Thanks!

When Luck Strikes

I'm certainly not one of the lucky ones and have experienced more setbacks than success in my life, but to others in bad situations I have always told them that finally things will go your way (and fully believing it except for my own situation). But as a rare occation, I finally experienced it myself. In two days I got a wonderful job, a great apartment in a nice area and I won 1st prize in a rhyming (!) competition with the prize of ecological baby clothes and toys worth 2000 SEK. None of it could have come at a more perfect time.

The constant nausea, throwing up and migraines have finally subsided although they're still far from gone, but that's what's to be expected. The baby is kicking along and my belly is growing by the day it seems. All that's left now is for my husband to return to Sweden so that he won't miss all of this. I know that there is a risk of him not being here in time for the birth, but I have to stay optimistic, for all three of us. I've planned for others to be there for me, just in case, but there's no point in getting myself stressed up by thinking negative and I still keep my hopes up that everything will be alright in the end and that the baby will have both his/her parents there when it sees the world for the first time.

Yesterday I went to see my two best friends that also happen to be pregnant and due around the same time as myself. We haven't had the oportunity to hang out much for the past few years for different reasons and it feels great to be settled in Sweden and have those two fantastic women to share all the worries and hopes with. Not many people are lucky enough to have their best friends being pregnant at the same time!

I can't move in to the apartment until October 1st, but that will give me some time to sort out the things that are left to be sorted, concentrate on my new job, the baby, my friends and everything in between. And once I've moved in, I'll just have a short walk from Linda, my aunt but sister and closest friend, the one I call when I'm sad and the one that always makes me feel like everything's going to be ok. And see, this time she was right!

Oh, and I'll return to my usual blogging about travelling, saving the world and what not, but for the next few months it will be layered with more personal posts. I hope that's ok.

Discover Sweden - Marks Municipality

View from Slottsberget, Öresten

I will begin a series of attractions in Marks Kommun, my home municipality. This is an attempt to an introduction to that series and might be edited later on. Future posts will include photos and more specific details about areas.

The word Mark means borderland or border forest. The municipality of Marks Kommun is situated in the South-Western end of Västra Götaland in the West of Sweden and was created in 1971 by combining two market towns and six tier municipalities. It's regional centre became Kinna.

Main Villages

The earliest villages were established along the rivers and streams of Viskan, Surtan and Häggån and ancient graves can be found around these areas. The regional centre, Kinna, is the largest of the villages and the name comes from the word kinn, which means hillside (since it's situated between two hills). Most notable of Kinna are the white wooden estates from the early 19th century for suppliers of raw material like wool, cotton and yarn for spinning and weaving. The material was distributed to the women in crofts and farms in the are, whom made fabrics that the trader bought back and sold forth to merchants and peddlers. The weaving and trading of fabrics around Mark are still famous and has given the region the nickname "Textile Kingdom." 

The village of Skene is situated just West of Kinna and also along the river Viskan. The name is most likely a combination of the words skadh and vini, which would mean stream and pasture. On a small hill called Nycklaberget overlooking the village is a place called Galgbacken from 1682, which used to be an execution site where people were hanged, beheaded or burned for their crimes.

Örby lies East of Kinna and the name comes from the word ör which means gravel, and by which means village. Although Öresten doesn't technically belong to Örby anymore, is used to be part of the parish. Öresten used to be an important (and the largest in Västergötland) foothold for the war against the Danes and was mentioned the first time in Swedish history in 1366. The castle, which is situated on the hill of Slottsberget (Castle Mountain) fell in the hands of the Danes the same year. Although the castle was destroyed three times during its many battles, it was rebuild twice, which wasn't all that popular among the countryfolk as it was a general opinion that Öresten was the main reason for the many troops that burned and destroyed what came in their way. The countryfolk gathered 100 oxes to buy the castle, just to destroy it. The year was 1521 and Öresten was destroyed for the third and last time. Today it's a beautiful area for strolling among leafy forests and the stream of Slottsån (Castle Stream) and from the top of the hill is a gorgeous view of the surrounding forests, fields and waters. A few stones still remain from the ruins of the castle as well as the remains of the moat.

Landscape

Mark is characterized by wide forests, valleys, hundereds of lakes and streams and is an excellent area for exploring the wilds. The Courier Trail is a perfect way to discover the area and is said to have been ridden by postal couriers 600-700 years ago. Several nature reserves provide a closeup with nature. My personal favourite is Hyltenäs Kulle (Hyltenäs Hill) which used to be the site of a large hunting lodge belonging to the merchant George Seaton. The lodge was burned to the ground in 1923 but the basement's narrow passages are still there and makes an exciting playground for children and adventurous adults. Today the hill is a popular picnic area that provides excellent view of the surrounding forests and lakes with a rich birdlife. The forests mostly consists of hazel, birch and mountain ash and a lime alley that was planted during George Seaton's time leads into the nature reserve. Other plants that were once cultivated but now grow wilde include privet, spiraea, sycamore maple and chestnut. Hiking tracks have been created around the hill and down to the lake.

Other reserves includes Lekvad Nature Reserve in Berghem, along the river Viskan. It provides charming views of mighty tree formations on the steep slopes and a thick vegetation. Sea lampreys and salmon trout have their spawning grounds past the mill canal. Seven Streams in Torestorp is a splitting of the Torestorpsån River into seven streams. A footpath follows babbling brooks and leafy greenery. The area is considered to be the mostbeautiful in spring, when it's covered with wood anemones and the water volume is at its greatest.
Björkesbacka Nature Reserve lies east of Örby and it great for seeing how people lived in the area with its old buildings, rich flora and fauna. Although the buildings aren't open to the public it still gives a good opportunity for a glimpse in the past. A trail, that is accessible to all (including disabled), takes you through the area. It's planned that Björkesbacka will continue to retain the character of the old working forest home in the 1900s. Meadows will be cut with scythes and pastures will be grazed by sheep and Highland cattle.

Links and Contact Information

• http://www.mark.se/ The official website (in Swedish)
• http://www.vastsverige.com/en/Mark/ A comprehensive guide to the touristic Mark. Includes a list of accomodation, eating, sights and activities (Swedish/English)
• http://www.mark.se/sv/Upptack-Mark/Femdygnsprognos/  Displays a five-days weather forecast in Mark according to SMHI.

Mark's Tourist Office:

Marks Turistbyrå
Boråsvägen 40
511 80 Kinna

Sweden
Tele. +46 (0)320 21 72 70

Fax +46 (0)320 148 82
e-mail

Open Monday-Friday 10.00-16.00. In summer (June 13-August 20) 10.00-18.99, Saturdays 10.00-15.00. Also on Sundays during July from 10.00-15.00.

Små Grodorna Translated!

"Små grodorna" ("The Little Frogs") is a traditional Swedish song and ring dance which is usually sung and danced at Midsummer (and Christmas). The dance is supposed to illustrate what frogs don't have, like ears and tails. In Midsummer we dance it around the Maypole/Midsummer pole and at Christmas around the Christmas tree. 

The melody has apparently been traced from a military march from the French Revolution; "La Chanson de l'Oignon" ("The Onion Song") with the refrain "Au pas, camarade, au pas camarade / au pas, au pas, au pas!" (At walking pace, comrade!"). It is said that the French's enemies during that time, the Brits, changed the lyrics to a rather snide one; "Au pas, grenouilles!" ("At a walking pace, small frogs!"). It's unknown where the Swedish lyrics comes from, but it's possible that it was inspired by the English ironic one.

Here's the lyrics in Swedish and English:

Små grodorna, små grodorna är lustiga att se

(Small frogs, small frogs are funny to see)

Små grodorna, små grodorna är lustiga att se

(Small frogs, small frogs are funny to see)

Ej öron, ej öron, ej svansar hava de

(No ears, no ears, no tails have they)

Ej öron, ej öron, ej svansar hava de

(No ears, no ears, no tails have they)

Kou ack ack ack, kou ack ack ack.

Kou ack ack ack ack kaa

Kou ack ack ack, kou ack ack ack.

Kou ack ack ack ack kaa

Swedish Midsummer

One of my favourite holidays midsummer and today is Midsummer's Eve. The sun will set at 10.16 PM where I live and rise at 04.05 AM but Sweden is a long country and up north the sun never sets at this time of year, it just touches the horizon and rises again. On this coordinate though, most part of the night isn't dark, unless it's very cloudy.

Midsummer celebrations were meant to welcome the summer and fertility in agrarian times. In the early 16th century Swedes made their own version of German traditions by decorating houses and farm tools with foliage and raised tall, leafy maypoles to dance around. A crown of leafs and flowers decorate the heads of happy celebrating people. In the beginning mostly youngsters took part of the celebrations and indistrial communities, where mill employees were munching away on a feast of pickled herring, beer and schnapps. In the 20th century it developed into the most Swedish of all traditional festivities.

Midsummer Night is the lightest of the year and was long considered a magical night, as it was the best time for telling people’s futures. Girls ate salted porridge ("dream porridge") so that their future husbands might bring water to them in their dreams, to quench their thirst. They also kept watch at springs for a reflection of their husband-to-be in the water. 

On Midsummer Night, you could discover places where treasure was buried, for example by studying how moonbeams fell. When digging, you might be confronted by strange sights that would tempt you to laugh or speak, such as a lame hen pulling a large hay-load. If you managed to keep silent, you would find the treasure. 

Also that night, it was said, water was turned into wine and ferns into flowers. Many plants acquired healing powers on that one night of the year.

Where I live, the most important symbols of Midsummer are the decorated pole (and the dancing around it), the flower crowns and of course the food feast that almost always consists of pickled herring, new potatoes with cream and chive which is all swollowed down with schnapps. On Midsummer Night, the local tradition says that any girl who climbs seven fences under silence, picking a different flower in between each and then put the small bouqet under your pillow - then she will dream of her future husband. I tried it each year when I was a kid, but I have to admit that I never dreamt of Khalid (or anyone else for that matter, except once when I dreamt of my uncle, which was quite horrifying for a young girl!). Perhaps I did something wrong or simply couldn't help but to giggle with my fellow love-searching young neighbors while we should have stayed completely silence!

Anyways, me, dad and Oskar went for the traditional celebrations in Mariebergsparken in Kinna, that is the native district's park. The park was originally a bushy forest- and meadow ground as well as an old spot for digging gravel that all belonged to the farm Marieberg, whose manor house still stands. When the ground was bought by the native district's association, it was turned into a park and a couple of other old cottages have been bought and brought to the park. It's a popular and beautiful recreation area and weddings and other celebrations are often held in the park lodge. It was great seeing colourful people folk costumes and flower crowns doing "the frog dance" around the pole while enjoying a small picnic in the green grass! Afterwards we munched on pickled herring with trimmings with the rest of the extended family. No schnapps for me though, but I enjoyed the fresh strawberries with cream and sugar even more!

I'll post a video of the famous "Små grodorna", complete with dance and song (translated and all!) in my next post. Stay tuned!

Life Works in Mysterious Ways

Khartoum - Sudan, Ameln Valley - Morocco, Cairo - Egypt, Öresten - Sweden

 Even the smallest choices you make, the smallest turns in your everyday life, can really take you to unimaginable places - or away from them. 

Out of the three far-away countries I've lived, Sudan is probably the most extreme of them all. Whilst I had my good share of drama and political corruption, kidnapping, a police who "captured" my passport and persecution (links to previous blog posts) - but the fact is that I could easily have been there right now, if small and seemingly unsignificant events and decisions hadn't taken me elsewhere. Today the largest country in Africa is about to split in two: the north (Sudan) and the south (South Sudan). To my big surprise, many seems to think that this should be the solution to all the problems that have haunted the Sudanese people for centuries. People think that wars will be solved, disputes will be settled and poverty and health problems will magically disappear. Surely you can hope that the long lasting conflicts between the north and south tribes will settle, but as always, things are not that simple. Even if that would happen, Darfur will still be caught in the middle, without any solution close at hand. Thousands will continue to die from starvation and diseases, caught in tribal conflicts (and governmental funded slaughters) and displaced when their villages are being burned. Many will end up in miserable refugee camps, either in Sudan or Chad. Most will have no hope of a safe future.

A couple of days ago, CNN reported that a major military offensive might be on its way in Southern Kordofan (a north Sudanese state). The report is based on field reports and satellite images and that has captured what looks like at least 89 military vehicles in the city of Kadugli, the state capital, which is being controlled by the Sudan Armed Forces (SAF). The vehicles included heavy ammunition transport trucks, light vehicles and possible towed artillery pieces. In May, Southern Sudanese forces attacked a UN Mission in Sudan convoy in Abyei. 22 soldiers died and Sudanese troops took control of the city, forcing Southern Sudanese forces out. According to the chief of Southern Sudan's mission to the United Nations, Abiyei belongs to both the north and the south until the people in the city decide otherwise. Now representatives os Sudan and South Sudan have signed an agreement of the immediate withdrawal of Sudanese troups from Abiyei, but the fightings in South Kordofan continue to threaten and claim lifes. My husband is somewhat safe in the capital, Khartoum, but my worries will not ease until I have him within an arms length again.

I spent a few months in Morocco and although I was safely placed in the more safe and touristy places, the ghost of the Moroccan-Western Sahara conflict loomed all over the country and haunted the people. The massive popular movements that have surged through the Arab world in the past few months reached Morocco in February and King Mohammed VI's (in power since 1999) response was a promise of "comprehensive constitutional reform", but protests that have claimed lifes have continued. Yesterday some 10.000 protesters gathered in Casablanca against the king's proposed constitutional changes. Meanwhile unemployment and poverty continues to be a huge problem and one of the major reasons for the unrest.

Most recently I had both the unluck and privilege to witness the popular Egyptian revolution first hand. While teargas and gunshots flew outside my window in central Cairo the Egyptian people gathered in their hundered of thousands in Tahrir Square and across the country to demand that president Hosni Mubarak (who had been in power for over 30 years) step down. After 18 days and hundereds of people dead the people got what they demanded and the military took over. Revisit my blog posts from January to February for personal reports, videos and photos. Today Mubarak is charged with the deaths of the protesters and is in custody in a military hospital in Sharm al-Sheikh after having heart problems. Now his lawyer says that he's also suffering from stomach cancer. The expected presidential election is to be held in December and the parlamentary election is proposed to take place in September which has caused some concerns as new public opinion survey predicts that the islamistic Muslim Brotherhood will by then have gained influence over the consitution.

Meanwhile, in safe Sweden, the politics are swaying to the right, slowly but steadily. The taxes have been cut and apparently the economy is growing, the budget is balanced and unemployment is declining. Even so, long term sick-listed people are loosing their sickness benefits and declined economical benefits from the social services they are forced into work despite of cancer, heavy depressions or no ability to move their bodies. And now midsummer is approaching with dancing around the pole, sunset after 10 PM, herring and other wierd traditions and rituals. As much as I appreciate all the odd experiences in faraway countries, I think I'll spend a few years in my country. I may think its dull or even boring at times, but at least I'll be safely away from violent uprisings, teargas, kidnapping and shootings. The only thing missing is to share the safety with my beloved husband.

Picnic Festival and Swedish National Day

Today is the Swedish National Day and I went to Picknickfestivalen (the Picnic Festival) in Göteborg with my beloved brother Jimmy and beautiful Elina. The festival is arranged each year to promote diversity and fellowship and is against racism. Bands and artists have been on stage since early afternoon until some time before midnight and thousands of wonderful people have enjoyed the Swedish summer on blankets in the green grass. What a better way to celebrate our National Day than to welcome and cherish our multicultural society that brings so much to our lives?

"The Picnic Festival is a free of charge cultural experience with the intention to change through the unprejudiced meeting of people. Without pointers and loud protests we want to spread the message that increased diversity and fellowship contributes to a better society." (own translation from the Swedish webpage)

They day was beautiful; the music was good, the people were greater and the atmosphere was fantastic. Maybe I'll make it a tradition to come to that festival each National Day!

Peps in My Heart

I'm sorry that I haven't updated in so long, things have been a bit wierd lately and my head haven't worked properly, to say the least. I'll write more on that topic at a later point.

I'm in Sweden, as you know, and am currently waiting anxiously for Khalid's stay permit. It's empty without him and I can't help to worry about his well being and all, with the situation being as it is in Sudan and all. But all's well that ends well and in the end we'll have yet another obstacle that we overcame with patience and love.

Summer is here, and the Swedish summer can't be compared with anything else in the world. I've travelled far; from paradise beaches with turqoise glimmering waters to smoking sulphur smelling landscapes to the vast deserts, but in the end Sweden in summer time is very very hard to beat. So to celebrate the coming of clear blue skies, the smell of blooming fields, green forests and sparkling lakes, I'll share a song with you. From the sixties into the nineties, Peps Persson has brought blues and reggae to Sweden with his charectaristic voice and sound that brings happiness and goodness into the cold Swedish hearts. Bob Marley is said to have said that Peps Persson is the only white man that has reggae in his blood. Wether he really said it or not, or if it's true or not, I cannot say.

Peps turned even more into a personal hero when he in 2010 decided to sue the racist Sweden Democrats (SD) for hijacking a song of his ("Grannen", which means "The Neighbour") and cutting it down to one verse as a political propaganda for the party. The SD politician responsible for the act did so with the message of "This is why I vote for SD" on a webpage, while in fact the lyrics of the song is meant to advocate the complete opposite of SD's message. This song, "Oh boy" from 1992 is one of my favourites and is a signature summer song for me. I'll make an amateur attempt to translate the lyrics below. Enjoy!

"Oh boy!
What a beautiful weather, sun's shining today.
Oh boy!
No heavy clothes are needed, and that I like.
Stand up and jump, it's sunny today,
and on a day like that you can't lie and slack.
No, leave that and come with me outside
when summer's coming, now winter is gone.
Oh boy!
Hear the bird song, they sing so you get dizzy.

Oh boy!
Here in the yard's path, the road leads to an adventure.
Yes, imagine that you can be so happy
of the ground's flowers and of green leafs.
And the child inside you comes home again
to forgotten dreams and to the summer.
Oh boy!

Oh boy!
What happy tunes, it's pulling and quivering inside of me.
Oh boy!
A thousand million hugs I want to give you.
Yes, imagine that it can be so easy sometimes.
So simple as to hold out a hand,
and wipe the gravel off a child's cheek,
and feel the warmth from a summer wind.
Oh boy!
What a gift from above it is to live today.

Oh boy!
The pure gift of God, is it strange that I'm happy?
For the sun's shining, and you are here,
and earth is spinning on it's heavenly sphere.
And really when you feel like this,
the world is close to a paradise."

Cairo Protests - Flashbacks

One of many military helicopters above Tahrir

Maybe I'm just in a period when every emotion is hightened, when small things are blown out of proportions, and I hope that's the case. I thought I had gotten over what happened in Cairo, but apparently that isn't so. I feel bad for reacting the way I do. I wasn't, after all, part of the revolution; I didn't get shot, none of my friends or family got killed or emprisoned. And still, it affected me in ways I couldn't have predicted. A couple of nights ago I woke up from a semi-sleep by two helicopters circling above the house and in a second I was back in Cairo. It took me a while before I fully realized that I was safely in a small town in Southwestern Sweden, but the panic was hard to slip away from and sleep was no longer an option.

Meanwhile in Egypt, former president Hosni Mubarak is being transferred to a military hospital while waiting for the Tora prison to be medically equipped to recieve him, says Egyptian newspaper al-Masry al-Youm. A couple of weeks ago, Mubarak suffered a heart attack during the questioning about the murdering of pro-democracy protesters during the revolution. 

Egypt's military interim government is denying the accusations of Gaddafi's Egypt based cousin Ahmed Gaddaf al-Dam of funding the Libyan government and of recruiting Egyptian mercenaries, Reuters says. The Egyptian military has so far been careful to not take sides in the Libyan situation but has kept the border between the two countries open to assure that aid, medical equipment and food can reach the Libyans. The number of refugees fleeing Libya into Egypt is far above 100.000. I haven't found a current number, but a month ago, the UNHCR reported the number to be at least 118.000. If anyone has a more up-to-date number, please let me know.

Back to Reality

It feels surreal that I was in Egypt just 9 days ago. It feels much longer, or that I haven't been there at all. It's like one of those strange dreams that leaves you waking up confused, not knowing what was real and what wasn't. I was just away for three months - it's incredible how much can happen during such a short time. My whole life as I knew it is gone and once back in Sweden I'm suddenly in a completely new role, with different visions and plans. I'm still me, but things have definitely changed.

I've been having trouble sleeping since I got back, but I hope that will change within the next week. It has to. It's amazing how apparently small happenings can turn into enormous life changing moments, revolutions on the inside and outside. I know I'm not making much sense at the moment, but hopefully I will catch up with my thoughts and feelings soon enough.

Revolution = Ego Boost?

Sveriges Radio's nation wide news program (Ekot) called for another interview today, February 4th.

To listen: http://sverigesradio.se/sida/default.aspx?programid=83&play=2888474&playtype=S%E4ndning 

To read: http://sverigesradio.se/sida/artikel.aspx?programid=83&artikel=4332952

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Sveriges Radio Sjuhärad (SR P4 Sjuhärad) called for an interview on January 30th.
http://sverigesradio.se/sida/artikel.aspx?programid=95&artikel=4320568

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We met Göteborgsposten (GP) in Cairo for an interview on January 31st.  This is an extract from a longer article about the protests.

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Short interview published in Borås Tidning (BT) on February 3rd. 
http://www.bt.se/nyheter/mark/article2267255.ece

So Long Sweden! Time to Leave the Darkness Behind

There is something very special about the nights before a travel, no matter how old you are. It reminds me of the night before Christmas when I was just a kid, when you were so excited that it felt like your chest would burst and spew out butterflies and laughter. It's almost like that now, because the day after tomorrow, I'm leaving.

I'm nervous and happy and it feels like freedom is finally lurking behind the corner. I can almost see her. What was planned to be a month's visit in Sweden turned out to be 10 months of illness, without any money and my baby cousin got cancer. I'm 29 years old and had to stay with mum, when I wasn't in the hospital. That kinda sucked, but I know that I needed the help and at least it wasn't permanent, plus I got the chance to hang out with my darling sister and brothers. In the end, everything turned out alright. The illness mysteriously disappeared, my cousin got well after months of awful treatments and the money landed in my account just in time for Christmas shopping. And now, with a one-way ticket in my hand, I feel that I can leave that chapter of my life behind.

This is the first time I'm travelling somewhere somewhat unprepared. I'm usually very carefully planning everything; know exactily where to stay, where to buy what, what to see and what to expect about the people and culture, what the traffic is like, the climate, taxi costs, everything. But not this time. This time I'm giving in to the excitement of finding it out once I get there, but then of course I already have someone who knows all the things I don't yet know. It feels great to have the freedom and at the same time be able to rely on someone else to take care of all the practicalities.

Most of my friends and family don't even know I'm leaving now. The one-way ticket was booked recently and suddenly the day just arrived. So, for those who want's to say hi before I go, the doors will be open tomorrow afternoon and evening. And if you can't make it tomorrow, then come visit when I live in that paradise town down south! My place will always be open to near and dear ones, wherever I currently am. Hopefully in a month or two, when I've spent some time in the bustling smoggy city, I'll be close to picturesque beaches where I'm sure some of you won't mind come visit!

I'll be back of course. I'll always be back, but this time I'm not sure if it will be in a few months or much longer. I still hope it will be within a year though. Let's see how that goes.

Swedish Christmas Traditions II

Saint Lucy

Early in the morning on December 13th, a woman dressed in white and with a crown of candles on her head, can be seen in the front of a procession of white dressed female attendants, "star boys" and brownies. The front woman is called Lucia and she represents a Sicilian martyr and saint that died under emperor Diocletianus persecutions. Legends claim that before her death, the virgin ripped her own eyes out and sent them to her betrothed. The mother of God then provided her with a new set of eyes that were even more beautiful.

In English, this feast goes by the name "Saint Lucy's Day" or "Feast of St. Lucy." Kindergardens, schools , churches and choires arrange these processions which parents are attending. Different Lucias are voted for in cities around the country, usually based on their looks and voice, similar to beauty contests.

A recurring problem during Lucia celebrations in Sweden seem to be fainting. Some claim that the cause of fainting is that the candles in the hair "eats up" the oxygen in your brain. This, however, is a myth. The explanation behind the phenomenon is simply low blood pressure from heat, psychological pressure and from standing up for a long time. So if you plan to delight your neighborhood by spreading the light of Lucia, make sure to drink lots of water and sit down with your head between your knees if the dizziness creeps upon you!

The initial song that the Lucia procession sings as they enter the room is "Sankta Lucia", which is also sung as they exit. Here's a translation in English:

Night walks with a heavy step
Round yard and hearth,
As the sun departs from earth,
Shadows are brooding.
There in our dark house,
Walking with lit candles,
Santa Lucia, Santa Lucia!

Night walks grand, yet silent,
Now hear its gentle wings,
In every room so hushed,
Whispering like wings.
Look, at our threshold stands,
White-clad with light in her hair,
Santa Lucia, Santa Lucia!

Darkness shall take flight soon,
From earth's valleys.
So she speaks
Wonderful words to us:
A new day will rise again
From the rosy sky…
Santa Lucia, Santa Lucia!

Freedom is Slavery?

Winston Smith lives in a society where the people at all times are subordinated to the state; everyone is under constant governmental surveillance, both physically and mentally. Mind control and a new language, Newspeak, is developed to prevent the people from critical thinking. Through a telescreen, propaganda is streaming in every home and public place and monitors the people. Throughout the society posters of Big Brother warns the people: BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU. 

This dystopian society is described in George Orwell's novel Nineteen Eighty-Four and was written in 1948-1949; a fantastic novel, but it is so much more than that. Orwell's intention was to warn people of the effects of the Eastern states that were forming during the time of writing. But the warning was not solely of Communism and Fascism, but of a future development that would affect all nations, no matter of their political foundation. His visions about oppressing dictatorships are slowly creeping upon the West today; we are being monitored, media is far from impartial, freedom of information and expression are only pretty words that governments use to manage the masses.

As no one can have missed: WikiLeaks' publishing of classified documents have caused governments to sway. Hillary Clinton describes the leaks as "an attack on the world" and WikiLeak have been cut out from Pay Pal for "violation of the PayPal Acceptable Use Policy, which states that our payment service cannot be used for any activities that encourage, promote, facilitate or instruct others to engage in illegal activity." The organization have also been dropped from Amazon.com Inc. that acted as a website host for breaching terms of service. In Sweden, the public is expressing it's outrage for PayPal's cowardice. WikiLeaks have not been proved guilty of any crime, on the contrary they have published documents that by all means concern the public. Governments have been revealed to commit crimes against humanity in these documents and any information that directly affect our societies are our concern. We are being monitored by governments and now WikiLeak, in a way, monitors the governments. I salute them.

WAR IS PEACE, FREEDOM IS SLAVERY, and IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH.

- Slogan of the Brotherhood, Nineteen Eighty-Four

WikiLeaks' frontman, Julian Assange, is being accused for sex crimes of two Swedish women. Many believes this to be a setup and I'm not qualified to judge what is true and what isn't. But what is  true is that Assange is merely a face of a much larger organization. His actions or personal qualities have little to do with the values and distinctions of WikiLeak. The fight for freedom and democracy will continue with or without him. The world is finally reacting now that the disclosures are on tabloids all around the globe. It is my sincere hope that the leaders will realize that their actions no longer can be done behind our backs, that they will be forced down on their knees and see that governments are meant to serve the people, not the other way around.

Do the world a favor and cancel your accounts on PayPal and Amazon (and tell them why). Ways to donate to WikiLeaks and support their struggle for free information can be found here.

Swedish Christmas Traditions I

It's now 4PM and the temperature is holding steady at -2 degrees Celcius. Powder light snow corns are circling peacefully in the air and the light of the day is now a memory. My head is throbbing with pain of an approaching migraine, but I swollowed a painkiller and endure it; this Sunday marks the beginning of the coziest of the Swedish holidays. Four weeks of warm hearth fires, hot chocolate and mum's Christmas bread lies ahead. No other holiday is so full of joy as this one; no other holiday brings families and friends together than this one.

Christmas season generally starts around 1st of Advent, the fourth Sunday before Christmas Day. The word advent derrives from the latin word adventus, meaning "arrival" which indicates the coming of the Lord. Sometime during the 1930's the Swedes started to hang Advent stars in their windows, a tradition coming from Germany and symbolizes the star of Betlehem that lead the three wise men to the child Jesus. On this Sunday, a candlestick with four candles start to decorate the Swedish homes and the first candle is lit. Every Sunday until Christmas, one more candle is lit. An electrical candlestick is placed in the windows, usually with seven candles in the shape of an upturned V. Traditionally, lights are lit in the windows around this time to light up the way for people on their way to the early Christmas-morning services in church.

At the same time the "Julskyltning" starts, a word that could be translated as "Display Sunday" and refers to the time when shops start to decorate their windows for Christmas. Where I live, in a small village in the south-western parts of the country, this is an important and popular occurence. There aren't many shops in the village, but this has been compensated with a small fair, with lotteries, sale of traditional hot mull wine and gingerbread biscuits and a Santa parade which ends with Santa Claus himself is giving out sweets to the little ones.

Culture Crashes

There's been a lot of talk about Sweden's  failure in integrating its immigrants. Some blame it solely on the Swedes, that they are discriminating and unsympathetic. This may be true, but it's only one reason of a complex situation. To get a better understanding of the difficulties of integration into a new society, all you have to do is to travel abroad, to any country which some of the immigrants are representing in our society. The only societies outside of Sweden that I can claim to have some kind of knowledge about is Morocco and Sudan, in which the latter is the one that is furthest away from my own.

When I found out that I was going to Sudan, it was on pretty short notice, but I did my best to get as prepared as possible. Except for the traditional travel preparations like basic phrases, some 15 different vaccinations, passport and the like, I did some reading about the culture. I was already aware of the culture crashes I would experience, although I didn't have a clear picture of which these crashes would be. Which ever way I looked, I always ended up focusing on the Muslim society. I had never lived in one before and had all the expectations, fears and prejudices that everyone else has that don't have a closer knowledge of it. I was going to the capital, Khartoum, and was a 100% sure that I would have to cover my hair whenever I stepped out of the house, that I shouldn't look men in the eye and that I couldn't discuss politics or religion as such.

I landed on a midnight in the end of August. It was some 40 degrees Celcius, humid and a minor sand storm, haboob, was brushing my face. We went straight to the house, which had lost the electricity because of the haboob and it wasn't until the next morning that I got to see where I had landed. I wanted a cold drink, so nervously I covered up, wrapped my head in a scarf, carefully tucking in all visible hair strands, and went out to look for the closest shop. The houses in the neighbourhood were all secured with high walls and guards, the dust road was uneven and the sun was merciless and - everyone was looking at me. 

Not long after, when I had befriended several westerners in the area, I learned that it wasn't required to cover your hair, at least not for a westerner. Looking a man in the eye or shaking his hand was usually not a problem either. Sure, there were those that were more conservative than others, but those were a minority. Basically I learned that most of the things I had expected and feared about this society, weren't true at all. 

The conclusion is that even though I eventually found my place in the Sudanese society, accepted and got accepted, I never got integrated. True, I didn't live there long enough to get the chance to fully integrate and I didn't have time to learn the language fluently. And truth his, even if I would have had the chance, I don't think I'd ever be able to integrate fully. I would, of course, follow the laws, live among them, befriend them and love them, but I would never become a Sudanese. But what's more important is that it wouldn't matter, because I would be accepted anyways. Even if I would never be exactily like those who were born there, they would still see me as an equal and welcome me into their society. So, if the immigrants in Sweden do the same, which most of them do, why can't we treat them the same way as they would treat us?

Sweden - Not so Perfect

"A helping hand"

According to Newsweek, Sweden is the world's third best country to live in. Many thinks of the Swedish society as an idyll, and that for many good reasons; you can express your thoughts and feelings however you want, you can criticize the government openly, demonstrate against what you think is wrong. You can be openly bi- or homosexual, practice any religion you want to, have the right to form and join work unions. Marriage is not a necessity to form a family, nor is it an issue to be a single parent. Anyone can study at the university - and get a student's loan. If you get sick, you get sickness benefits. When you become a parent, you get parental allowance and if you loose your job you either get unemployment benefits or social assistance - you don't have to worry about becoming homeless or go hungry.

It's agreed that it's hard to find many societies as free and democratic as the Swedish, but to what cost? Mayhap Sweden is a paradise, but how are the government and major companies using this concept? I have listed a few publicly disclosures that may change your view of the perfectness of Sweden:

• Lundin Oil is blamed for contributing to the vicious civil war in southern Sudan when they decided to explore and extract oil from an area called Block 5A, which triggered a bloody fight for control over the area between 1997 and 2003. The company is accused for knowing of the war crimes they have caused; ranging from mass rapes to people being forced to displacement.
• Saab signs a 4,5 billion kronor deal with Saudi Arabia this fall. This specific deal was concerning advanced early warning radar systems. Military products were also sent in March, April and May, most of which were classified as combat material, which can include "missiles, rockets, torpedoes, bombs, etc." A subsidiary, Saab Bofors Dynamics, were earlier in the year reported to have sold anti-tank missiles to the same country. “We’re talking about one of the world’s worst dictatorships. We can’t send weapons to dictatorships that should be buying food instead,” Green Party defence policy spokesperson Peter Rådberg says.
• WikiLeaks publishes a document revealing Swedish weapons to be used in the war in Iraq, not only by Americans against the Iraqis, but also the other way around. WikiLeaks founder, Julian Assange, was denied recidence permit in Sweden earlier this year.
• Furniture company IKEA are revealed to use child labour in the Philippines and Vietnam in 1997.
• Managers from Scania, a truck making company, are charged for violating United Nations sanctions for being part of bribing the former Iraqi regime of Sadam Hussein. The bribes paid reached millions of Swedish kronor.
• Atlas Copco Group is a mining equipment and services supplier that have been accused of repeatedly violating human and environmental rights and standards. "NGOs have charged that AGC has forcibly evicted, persecuted and killed local villagers, destroyed villages and destroyed water and agricultural land by discharging cyanide and other heavy metals." says OECD Watch.
• Clothing giant H&M use certified organic cotton that isn't actually organic, making the company guilty of fraud. They also got a lot of criticizm for discarding unused clothing instead of giving it away to charity.

You can continue to dig and search for corruption and violations and certainly find whatever you're looking for and I'm aware of that this small list is somewhat to pull information out of it's context. But my point with this is that even though something seems good, even perfect, there is always room for improvement. This applies to everything in life and I think it's a good rule to live by; don't ever take things for granted.

A Modern Layla and Majnun - Part II

If you haven't already, read A Modern Layla and Majnun - Part I first. Now, let's continue the story...

On the return to Sweden, the woman went straight to looking for an apartment that they both could be happy in. The man was still in Sudan, but on a cold October night he stepped out of the airplane in Stockholm. A new chapter of their lives had just begun.

Shortly after their longed for reunion, the woman, who had suffered from depressions for many years, was again stricken with the dark cloud of angst. It became more and more difficult for her to see through it and eventually she ended up blind to the world's happiness. She was so blinded by her angst that she failed to see the slow fall of her beloved. The man was new to the country and the culture. He didn't understand a word of what was being said in the streets and his pride took a punch when he realized how difficult it would be to get a job in this cold country. 

The relationship was going down and neither the woman or man had the strength to save it. One cold evening, about a year after he first arrived to Sweden, he went to the bus station and left.

Three years went by. They met occationally and the atmosphere were always tensed. The tension sometimes escalated to hate. The man was upset with the way the woman lived her life, and the woman was upset because she thought that it no longer was his concern.

Then one day, the man decided to leave Sweden. Since he had developed a good relationship with the woman's family, he came to visit more frequently now that he knew that it might be a long time that he could see them again, if ever. The woman, who realized that the man was about to leave for good, slowly started to soften to his words. The days grew closer to the departure, and with that, the angst of again loosing him. He had, after all, always been close. She had known that she could see him more or less whenever she wanted to, but now, that was about to change.

The night before the departure, there was an explosion of emotions. The air in the room, where the man and woman was sitting, was literally static with electricity and so thick that you could cut it with a knife. Although they hardly even touched, just sat and looked at eachother and ocationally talked about nonsense, a long lost connection was rebuild. Their souls entwined, their hearts beat the same rythm and a blessing was laid upon them. It said: you will meet again.

To be continued at a later date...